Saying Goodbye

Honestly, I'm not even sure how to compose this post. Last Friday night, a week ago today, we said a final goodbye to our sweet dog, Emma. This whole blog started out as a silly dairy of sorts all about Emma. It's so heartbreaking that her story ended this way. 

We rescued Emma from the Savannah Humane Society in August of 2010. She was a puppy and so tiny and small. I remember going to look at the dogs at the Humane Society with the intent to adopt an older dog. We passed by Emma who was this teeny tiny thing, shrinking back in the corner of this large run. Miguel was the one who took to her first. I was hesitant because she was skittish of us and we hadn't wanted to bring a puppy home. Miguel talked me into choosing Emma - which wasn't very hard, because, hello PUPPY! 

Emma ended up being a real Godsend for me in many ways. Shortly after we adopted her I went into a real funk and depression. Emma was such a healthy thing for me while I was struggling with my place in the world, my identity, and learning to be in a new stage of life. She was a great outlet for me and our little adventures together helped give me something to focus on. You just need to go back to the beginnings of this blog to see what a big part of my daily life Emma was. 

The Humane Society had told us Emma was a black lab puppy, but she clearly never grew into that. She had a lot of terrier in her and liked to bark, dig, and do other terrier-like things. So some of that played into her obnoxious behavior and she always was a mess in the car. However, what I think really set her off was when our home was burglarized a few years back. Both Miguel and I were at work when it happened, and we don't know what happened to the dogs while we were gone. Emma ran away during the burglary and was later found and taken to the Humane Society. She's never been the same since that day. 

Over the years Emma's behavior became more and more neurotic and unpredictable. She became more and more anxious and nervous. About two years ago she began randomly jumping up from a peaceful sleep and attacking our other dog, Jack. It was scary and unprovoked. Emma had never been aggressive towards Olivia, but I began to worry that Olivia would get caught in the crosshairs of a random attack on Jack. She would also nip at Jack when the mailman came or someone walked down the street. It got worse with time. 

Alarm bells started going off in my head about Emma possibly hurting Olivia. About a year ago I reached out to various shelters and rescues and was turned down at everyone. Many actually gave me not so nice responses and told me Emma was acting out due to us having children and that becoming parents and having kids in the home wasn't a good enough reason to rehome a dog. If our situation had been as simple as wanting to rehome the dogs simply due to having kids, then that would be different. I was super discouraged and we tried other things to help control Emma's behavior including homeopathic remedies and a bark collar. 

Once I became pregnant with Juliet, and Olivia became more and more mobile and active, I felt really strongly about needing to do something about Emma again. I was just so scared she'd hurt our girls. We began working with our vet and tried various medications to help Emma. I kept thinking Emma was starting to do better, but then the medications seemed to stop having an effect. We upped the dosages to their max points and still we had no positive, lasting results. 

At the beginning of the year we started to actively look to rehome the dogs again. I just couldn't take the stress and constant worry that Emma may just "snap" at any given point.  I posted on Facebook looking for help and received a lot of negative feedback and judgement. Shelters and rescues again wouldn't take Emma due to her history of aggression. We ended up finding a home for Jack and having him out of the house actually seemed to help with Emma! I became really hopeful that by simply removing the other dog in the family that it had given Emma some sense of peace. 

But a week ago today all my fears came true. The day was wrapping up and we were waiting on Miguel to get home from work. Emma was napping on the floor and Olivia was calmly playing. Olivia passed by Emma, who was sleeping about a yard away, to take a book of the bookshelf. Emma jumped up out of nowhere and straight up bit Olivia in the face. Olivia fell backwards and hit the ground. Emma backed off almost immediately, as if she was surprised at what had just happened. I jumped up instantly. Olivia was doing a silent cry and held her hand over her eye. Pulling her hand off of her face was honestly one of the scariest moments of my life. I was so scared of what damage I was going to find.  Thank the Lord that the bite missed her eye!! She hardly cut the skin too. I'm so so  so grateful that Olivia wasn't more badly hurt. 

I put Emma on the screened porch and called our vet. I was in tears and shaking. I was so so upset about what had happened to Olivia, but also so sad about what this meant. After speaking with our vet, he agreed that we had exhausted all our options and we knew what we probably needed to do. He actually suggested we sleep on the decision, but I couldn't bring Emma back in the house in good conscious and the thought of having Emma here knowing what was going to happen in the morning was unbearable. 

Miguel got home and immediately took Emma to be put down. I have no memory of ever crying so hard. It was just so sad that this is how her story ended. I loved that dog. She annoyed me a lot and was an inconvenience, but she generally had a really sweet temperament and I felt like she had really been there for me during a hard time in my life. It may seem trivial to some that I felt so heartbroken about losing Emma, but I don't know a time where I have felt so sad. I felt like we had somehow let her down and I hated knowing what was going to happen and she had no idea. It was the worst thing ever. I sobbed - like ugly cried hard - for hours. 

End of the day, Emma was broken. Something had just snapped along the way. Our girls are more important and we could never put them in harms way. We honestly probably prolonged the inevitable for too long. I will never fully forgive myself that Olivia got hurt when we had imagined this as a possibility. We keep telling Olivia that "Emma is with Jesus". It's so sad but I hope she's happy now and no longer broken and that she is chasing squirrels. 

Emma Demma Do 

May 2010 - February 2018

(This is the blog post I wrote about the day we brought her home)

It's All Fun and Games Until Someone Ends Up In A Cone...

**I'm including images of wounds so if you don't like to see that sort of thing, you may not want to read this post**

The night before Miguel and I left for Hawaii Emma got into a terrible mess. I let the dogs out around 9 PM to go to the bathroom one more time before bed. We have a fence so I just open the door and let them run out to do their business in our overgrown backyard. Almost immediately we heard Emma yelp - loudly. Her distressed yelps continued (Miguel and I thought she was possibly in a fight with an animal) so Miguel and I ran outside to see what the problem was. It was pitch black and we couldn't see much until Emma ran towards us.

I honestly cannot describe how terribly gruesome a mess Emma got into. She ran over a rusty, metal shard and for lack of a better description scalped her chest open. She scalped about 8 inches of skin off her chest and belly and exposed her muscles and insides. When I first saw her skin hanging off her body, reaching the ground and her bloody insides, I was in complete shock and starting dry heaving. Thank God Miguel had just returned from LA that night and was able to take charge and spring into action! Miguel grabbed a towel, wrapped it around Emma and 'held her together'. We rushed to the only ER Vet in Savannah. Neither of us had shoes on and I was in my pajamas. We didn't have a very good experience with the vet here. Basically all they could do was bandage Emma up and suggested we go to Charleston for better care. Miguel and I ended up driving through the night to take Emma to Georgia Veterinary Specialist in Atlanta. The care Emma received in Atlanta was so much better than here in Savannah.

This is the piece of metal we believe Emma caught herself on. I took this picture after we had bent it down. It was originally sticking straight up. 

 Left: Some blood on my feet (I took this picture at the ER vet in Savannah while Emma was being bandaged up) Right: Blood stains on my car seat cover. 

Emma all bandaged up for the car ride to Atlanta

Long story short, Emma had surgery to remove the skin she scalped, to repair a torn muscle and to stitch up her belly. We were very thankful that she didn't end up needed skin grafts. Emma was at GVS for about 4 days and then a friend of my moms from Adopt-A-Golden Atlanta, Katie, picked her up and took her to my old vet in Atlanta, Duluth Animal Hospital. Emma stayed there until we got back. They changed her bandages and helped her during her recovery. I am so thankful for Katie and for GVS.

The first week Emma was home she was pretty pathetic and on lots of pain meds. I literally had to pick up her water dish to allow her to comfortably drink. She had to wear a shirt over her wound and the cone of shame to keep from licking. She even came to work with me one day!

Emma with her shirt and some of her meds.

Emma at work with me

After we had been home for a week I took Emma to the vet to remove her stitches. Emma did so well. They removed a ton! Poor puppy was torn up so bad! It was a little alarming to see how many stitches she had. They couldn't remove all of them because some were under a scab - when they removed the skin back in Atlanta they pulled extra skin on her stomach and stitched it together. However, there wasn't enough skin to completely cover everything so they had to leave a triangle area to scab over and heal itself. 

This is the first time I really looked at the scar. Kinda hard to see because the flash was so bright, but the wound is shaped in an upside down Y. The top of her chest where it is the brightest is also sewn together. 

Emma had been healing pretty well and getting back to her normal self. She was off pain meds after she got her stitches out. However, the past two days I've noticed Emma licking at her chest and when I checked her wound I realized it had started to re-open and had been oozing. I removed the little shirt Emma had been wearing and saw that it was wet with stuff and it removed some of the scab. I washed the shirt and we put Emma's Cone of Shame back on.

Emma, today, with her wound oozing. 

Miguel and I were really worried about Emma so I called the vet this morning to see if we needed to do something about the oozing etc. The vet said we had better bring her in just to check it out. Of course the vet didn't have an open appointment until noon, but what can you do? So we waited the morning out cleaning up after Jack who decided today would be an excellent day to get a stomach bug.

Haha, poor Emma trying to stick her head out the window with the cone of shame on!

I don't know why the vet made an appointment at noon, I sat in the waiting room for 30 mins because all the vets "went to lunch". Poor Emma was freaking out the entire time. She has reason to not like the vet I guess. Especially after the last month.

After we finally got into the examination room I had to wait again. That's when I noticed that there were cotton balls in a jar labeled Tongue Depressors. It bothered me so I took a picture. 

Emma began to freak out even more in the examination room and started trying to climb onto my shoulders and under my legs even before the doctor came in.

Pouts for Emma as she tries to get on my lap.

What dog? There's nothing to see here.

Somehow the vet managed to find Emma even though she hid herself so well!

I'm really glad I took Emma to the vet. They ended up cutting the scab off her wound. They said the flesh underneath looked good though. They gave us some topical medicine and told me that we have to clean her wound twice a day with Betadine. They re-filled her antibiotics and said we need to take her back in in two weeks to see how she is progressing. The wound looks a lot better after the scab was removed.

I am really ready for this whole ordeal to be over. As is Emma, I'm sure. We are over the expense of all this too. Pet Insurance would be wise. Oh well. I'm just thankful that Emma is healing and that we live in a day and age that we can help our fur-babies bounce back from an accident like this. 

I saw this picture on the internet the other day and thought it was funny and appropriate:

Recently

It's been a while since I've blogged, been too busy livin life, so no complaints here =) I still can hardly believe it's the middle of JULY! Asking "where has the time gone?!?" is definitely a reoccurring question on this blog!

We've really been enjoying our summer in the Amador household! It's so nice that Miguel gets a break from school! Spending so much time together is so much fun! The past couple of weekends we've really made an effort to relax and not put too much pressure on "getting things done". Weekends like the past one make me really appreciative of living at the beach. It really is awesome to wake up and just decide to go spend the afternoon relaxing and soaking up sun next to the ocean waves.

We haven't been completely lazy though! We've been doing a few things around the house too. A little home improvement here and there. Most recently Miguel installed some much needed cabinets in our laundry room. We're really pleased with the improved storage space. I've said it before and will say it over and over again I'm sure, but I am so thankful that Miguel is such a good handyman!

The puppy dogs are doing well. Miguel has been taking them on late evening runs around the neighborhood. They love coming back from a run all dirty and panting and have to jump up on me to "tell me all about it". =) I can't believe we've had Jack for over a year now! I love that dog! I can't help but roll my eyes every time I think about him. But with each eye roll comes a grin. He cracks me up. What a nut!

I've been staying busy, but when I sit down to think about what I've actually been doing nothing too terribly exciting comes to mind. Work has been keeping me busy and I've been having to stay an hour later most days. That extra hour really makes a difference in my evening routine. I enjoy work though, so it's not too bad... even though summer camp seems to bring out a lot of wacky people and situations!

One recent highlight that comes to mind, however, is an Art Bash party I went to last week. My co-workers and I had done a party a couple of months ago and had so much fun we did it again. This time was especially fun because we painted our pets! Originally the plan was for me to paint one of my dogs and Jennifer paint the other, but due to last minute babysitting issues Jennifer couldn't attend. I ended up painting the Emma-doodle. I honestly felt bad painting one dog and not both... like I was a bad puppy-parent and Jack would think I loved Emma more! Ha! I'm so silly, I know. Luckily, Jack seems unfazed ;) We had a fun time at the party. Emma's nose gave me some trouble, but I think the painting still turned out cute!

Ohh! The ever so talented Izzy from Izzy Hudgins Photography finished editing the photos from our anniversary session! I'm so thankful that my parents gifted us this fun experience! Miguel and I haven't found the time to sit down and decide exactly what prints we want yet (I think we are just living in denial that we can't afford every single one)... there are so many we like! Izzy posted a bunch to her facebook page that you can check out if you want. These here are screenshots, so, of course, I'm sure the quality doesn't do them justice.

 

Well, thats pretty much all the "update" I can think of right now. Super, super, super excited for our family vacation coming up... most importantly because I get to spend a whole week with this cutie pie!

Puppy Crutches?

Emma and I have spent the morning at the vet. Unlike Jack who thinks the vet is a great opportunity to make new friends and investigate all sorts of interesting smells, Emma chooses to have panic attacks. So basically I spent the last hour on the floor of the vet trying to comfort a very upset dog while at the same time gallons of dog saliva and pounds of tiny black dog hairs collected all over my clothes.

Yesterday Jack and Emma were rough housing and Emma ended up hurting her leg. For the past 24 hours she hasn't put any weight on it and has been hobbling around like a three-legged dog. Actually, Emma is pretty impressive and agile with only three legs, but I'd still prefer her to have four working legs!

Emma protested to the vet in every way. She whined and whimpered so much that it brought tears to my eyes and gave the vet a very hard time trying to determine where exactly it hurt on her leg. We ended up having an X-ray taken of her leg and paw. Thankfully there are no breaks. The vet has Emma on some anti-inflamatories for the week to help the swelling and pain go down. He also told Emma to "take it easy". If anyone knows a good way to explain this to Jack I'd be eternally grateful... =)

I've put a blanket down on the couch and let Emma get up there to rest. It seems to be the only solution I've come up with so far to separate the dogs. In theory they know they're not allowed on the couch so Jack should leave Emma alone up there...

... unless you go to grab something from the other room and come back to this...

Invisible Fence UPDATE

A while back I wrote about installing our invisible fence for the dogs. Someone recently asked for an update so here one is =)

The decision to get an electric fence has definitely been a good one for us. We only have a small section of the driveway where the dogs might run off, the rest of our backyard is blocked. 

The dogs respect the fence. They've only zapped themselves right at the beginning when they were learning how to use the fence. Now they put some space between themselves and the fence. So much so now that we let them outside quite often without their collars on. 

Emma modeling her collar-free neck while looking down the driveway at our neighbors

Jack modeling his collar-free neckline.

I will say that Emma did run over the fence last month. We hadn't put her collar on her in a couple of weeks and I think she had been testing how far down the driveway she could get without getting zapped. Well, a man walked his dog in our yard and Emma decided she couldn't stand his taunting anymore. I don't know if it was the fact that she hadn't been zapped in a while, or the fact that a dog was marking "her" yard, or a combination of both, but she took off after the dog. Jack, being a follower, took off after Emma. I have seen other dogs walk by our house, and have seen squirrels and cats in our yard without Emma running after them... so all in all I think the fence has been a great choice and has served us really well!

Hope that is a helpful update!

"What Is A Weekend?"

Last weekend my mom introduced me to the wonderful show Downton Abbey. If you haven't heard of it, quickly go to PBS.org and check it out! To quote one of my favorite characters, Dowager Countess of Grantham, "What is a week-end?". Well, Dowager Countess, a weekend is my favorite part of the whole week and Miguel and I spent Saturday morning enjoying it thoroughly! 

To start, we headed down the street to Thunderbolt and took some pictures of the shrimping boats and dock. We love our new lens! Thanks again Amadors! We hadn't spent time down by the water in a few months and it was so nice to soak it all in again. The weather was so perfect too! A January day in the 70's! 

I did some construction work while we were taking pictures too... thought I'd help out a little, you know?

Next we headed on to the farmers market at Forsyth Park. Miguel and I like to go there every Saturday morning and pick up some local greens and meat. This week we picked up some eggs that we just scrambled this morning. YUM! We also picked up some potatoes and cherry tomatoes that we are planning on making a meal out of tonight!

After the farmers market each weekend, we head to Zunzi's for our traditional Saturday lunch. We had some time to kill before it opened so Miguel and I walked around Forsyth Park and enjoyed the nice weather for a bit. We still had the camera with us from the marina so I snapped a few pictures.

I love all the Spanish Moss that hangs from the trees here in Savannah!

The weather was so nice and there was just a really good vibe and energy in the park yesterday! I want everyone to visit Savannah and experience the park on a good Saturday morning! I think it would be very hard not to fall in love with the city after such a visit! Families hung out enjoying the play ground and riding their bikes, SCAD students were filming, people read books on the benches, and there was a Zumba class taking place at the pavilion.

This picture makes us look like we were the only people in the park =) I just keep thinking how much fun the dogs would have if they had free reign to run here!

After lunch (OMG YUM!) Miguel and I took our traditional after Zunzis nap and slept really well and hard! After we woke up with took the dogs to the new dog park. The dogs always have so much more fun when Miguel goes with them because he plays with them much more than I do. 

The park was really busy! Everyone was enjoying the nice Spring Winter weather! Jack is always more social at the dog park and Emma seems more interested in chasing tennis balls or running around investigating things.

Miguel, the dogs and I really enjoyed our Saturday! Ughhhh, why do Sundays always come so fast?!? I'm going to stop blogging now and try to enjoy the last day of the weekend! It's rainy here today, so it looks like it may be a lounge in PJ's and watch movies sort of day! Happy weekend everyone!!!